The Care & Cultivation Of Lifelong Friendship

the care and cultivation of lifelong friendship

The picture you see above isn’t a stock photo. It’s me and the two women who, if they should murder anyone, I am obligated to help bury the body. There isn’t anything I wouldn’t do for either of them.

April, the red-haired girl, and I have been friends for over 50 years. We grew up three houses apart and I can’t actually remember not knowing her. I know all her kin and she knows all mine. We were maid-of-honor in each other’s wedding.

Twilah, the beauty in the middle, April and I met at summer Bible camp when we were in our early teens. We spent all summer, every summer for 5 years, together at camp and just kept up after that. It made no difference that she lived over 300 miles away. We kept her friendship through miles and years because she’s Twilah.

Here we are in our glory days as teens.

lifelong friendship

April                   Twilah               Alexandra

April and Twilah are more than friends. They’re family. And I don’t just love them, I respect them as women of faith and godly character. My life is so much better because they’re in it. Every woman should have an April and Twilah.

Hang on to the friendships of your youth that show promise to be a lifelong source of encouragement, truth-telling, and laughter. New friends are blessings too, but there’s a great perk of old friendships. History.

This is what history gets you:

  • You can go for periods of time without talking because life got busy and pick up where you left off.
  • There’s very little you have to explain because they know you.
  • There’s great security because even though you may develop vibrant new relationships with other women, history can’t be replicated.
  • The older relationships are comforting and solid. There’s something about certain faces as fixtures in the photo albums of your life. They’re woven in your life’s story.
  • When you’re done talking about all the new things happening in your life, you can always reminisce about shared memories. Then again, you don’t have to fill the air with talk at all.
  • Old relationships have stood the test of time and proven their value.
If you haven’t kept up with quality childhood friends, keep up with the quality ones you have today. Click To TweetIf you haven’t kept up with quality childhood friends, keep up with the quality ones you have today. It’s not rocket science: Show up. Borrow & return stuff. Give unsolicited, yet helpful, driving tips. Share their troubles. Apologize. Whisper in church. Eat at their momma’s table. Roll your eyes at them to their face. Die laughing. Build history.

Before you know it, there’ll be decades in the rearview mirror. And your life will be so much richer.

Share a comment and some love about your lifelong friendship.

lifelong friendship

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  • The only friends I have are lifelong friends. i love them all like family!

  • It is wonderful to have good friends. Maybe I should try to reconnect with some of mine. Thanks for your post:-)

  • This is a beautiful post. thank you

  • LaNeshe (

    Awww this is beautiful.

    • Alexandra T Armstrong

      Thank you, LaNeshe. I hope you have a great friend or two.

  • Oh I just love this so much! I cherish my friends and the word quality is what sticks! I have always been about quality over quantity. Great pictures!!

    • Alexandra Armstrong

      Thanks, Carly. I can’t believe that old picture hasn’t disintegrated. Quality picture apparently, too! 😂

  • Alexandra! YES! Quality of quantity is what I always say.
    Especially with every leading different lives and people not exactly being in the same “season” of life as you, the history of a friendship is incredibly important.
    i love how i can look at my high school bestie and she knows EXACTLY what I’m thinking.
    i love how I have friends that I can “pick up” the conversation from when we parted ways several months ago!

    • Alexandra Armstrong

      Justine, I hope you and your high school bestie are still great friends 40 years from now!

  • OMG, this is amazing!!!! My college friends are my nearest and dearest to me and we’ve been friends for well over a decade. And Although we are all over the country, I still feel close to them thanks to texts and the internet!

    Make new friends, but keep the old
    One is silver and the other gold!


    Berniedette |

    • Wife Sense

      So glad you liked the post, Berniedette. That poem! I have a plaque with that written on it (somewhere.) 😉

  • Amanda K

    This is amazing that you are all still friends! I still communicate with some of my friends that I have known for 15 years.

    Amanda ||

    • Wife Sense

      Before you turn around, that 15 years will turn into 40, Amanda. 👵🏻